woman silenced

Sometimes I forget that the darkness always lurks

The view from the empowered hill can be so blinding in its beauty

I forget that the dark is always there


Its despair

Its bleakness

Its shocking devastation


How it arrives, perhaps in a dream

Or in a sharp tempered outburst

And suddenly, boom, with an echoing thud

It has landed


The stomach knots

The tight throat

The darting elusive eyes that will not rest on another

For fear of the tirade of sobbing tears ready to flow and flood


Some call it a black dog

Not so to me

It is more like polluted smoke

Pouring from a chimney stack above a dystrophic industrial plant

Cloying and choking and filthy

Sucking the life from the very around air around it


Enveloping me in dread

Sending me scrambling for cover

Trembling, shaking, exhausted

Yet on high alert


Quaking and quivering at every sound

Yet begging to not be left in a void of empty silence


The light is floating above me there

Elusive; just out of reach

It’s love teasing me

Taunting me with its promise of peace


For today

Peace is a broken jigsaw puzzle

With no picture to guide me

All the pieces are the same shape of black

And they will not click together


But it is only for today

For tomorrow I may be reborn

Into a new wholeness

But for today, I am undone


Megan Freeland ©

Image courtesy of Pixabay


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