In this world of awakened consciousness it seems like every day there are new modalities, healings, processes and methods of ‘shedding your shit’, ‘manifesting abundance’ or ‘revealing your greater being.’ We are being promised that with ‘hard work’ and ‘dedication’ to self improvement, we can reach higher and higher states of awareness and empowerment.
But what if you are already pretty self aware. What if you have done a lot of inner work already and what if one of these methods is in fact very much the wrong method for you?
Most practitioners are well meaning, trained in their chosen method and wholeheartedly believe that they are there for your well being. But often there are a hidden percentage of people for whom the work can be damaging. Their disclaimers of not being therapists, lawyers, doctors etc, essentially means there is an element to the work that can potentially be harmful, or else why the disclaimer? Of course the answer is that they can’t be responsible for how an individual may react, misinterpret or fail to complete the ‘work’ or ‘course’ or ‘process’.
I write this today as a veteran of the self help world who has had some bad experiences. For example, I undertook a process once that was designed to show me the benefits and gains of my most desired and despised traits and show me how to bring equilibrium to my life. Halt the fantasies that are stopping me from achieving my greatest life and become grateful for the shadow aspects of my being.
Now let me say, I think that the premise is a valid one. I am a huge advocate of understanding the importance of the shadow side of life and see our existence as a manifestation of these energetic principles. The laws of quantum physics. I am there. I get it.
What I am not ‘there’ for is the potential damage that comes from the brutality of any mentally torturous process that is delivered on the premise that we are ‘re-writing our neural pathways’. The concept of being forced into a ‘collapse’ so that you can‘re-awaken’ in gratitude is the stuff of brainwashing and cults. Being told that in order to evolve and discover our greatest selves, we must divest ourselves of the death grip of our subconscious mind and see ourselves as mindless robots that are in a loop of a reactionary/stationary drive because we are so locked inside our programming may indeed be a great theory. But, and it is a BIG but; it is how we then decide we should try to change that programming that becomes a crucial decision. If you are on the personal development road, collapsing is something we can do all on our own, without the help of any other red hot pokers to antagonise us.
Once I again I will say that some of this stuff is true. We do need to wrestle with our subconscious and rewire our neural pathways. It is possible and it is beneficial. My point is about the way that this is done. Each individual needs to know for themselves the best way to challenge the shadows and dark of their lives. If, like me, you suffered some trauma and in particular you have ever been seriously suicidal, I encourage you to be very very cautious about allowing yourself to be subjected to so-called healing methods that put you through a brutal and torturous mental process.
I learnt a few years ago something that I didn’t really know before I began my healing journey (in fact was so scared by the fact that I thought that healing would be a torturous journey I did not want to start) But, healing can be gentle. You are allowed to use gentle methods. Methods which are loving, enlightening and nurturing. It doesn’t mean there won’t be tears and sadness or that you won’t feel angry, even enraged as you walk along transformations path. But you have choices.
Look, you may be the type who is prepared to swing on the frayed rope over the pit of tar and snakes, to reach the jagged cliffs on the other side. You might then climb with bloodied feet ready to battle the fire breathing dragon who is blocking the path to your own souls enlightenment, only to reach the top, triumphant, the first to raise your fist as the king or queen of mighty self empowerment. Congratulations, you are the cleverest of clever super-powered personal development ninja’s…but are you sure you even know what you just did, how you even got there and if any of it is going to last?
Maybe, you are more like me, prepared to take the slow walk around the valley, discovering the hidden secrets of self and gently exploring each region, happy to arrive at my destination with my two feet on the ground, full of knowledge and wisdom, feeling peaceful as I sit in the gentle shining light of my own version of self empowerment.
Maybe before you sign up for your next seminar or workshop, you should stop and decide if you really truly need it, or if you already have the answers you need inside of you. If you are a follower of mine you will know what I think….meditate on it first.
Maybe you just need to take a long walk in the sunshine, feel into the moment and realise that you are actually ok as you are right now. You are enough. The only thing you are not enough of, is secure in your idea of what enough ‘you’ looks like to everyone else. And you know what, sometimes I say….screw ‘em, I am fine with me just the way I AM.