I have fallen into darkness

That no one else can see

My love of God so strong

He’s turned his back on me


So sure of the power

Of the path of the divine

He sent me to the maelstrom

And said “Find me with your own vine”


So much love did my lord have

That he pulled me from his breast

And placed me in the burnt out field

To rage against my chest


I flung myself about

Called my righteous anger home

I swore at him

“Abandoner, how dare you leave me all alone?”


The silence that embraced me

Was a great and wrathful prong

I writhed in all my hard work

And my pointless spiritual song


“Love me oh great God

Show me miracles and more

Take me dancing

Lets go prancing

On your holy island shore”


Then suddenly from beneath my

Scabbed and Bloodied knee

Reared a many headed hydra

Every head a version

Of me


The first one is a little girl

Abused, confused and closed

The second one a woman

In her many coloured robes


The third I do not recognize

But it’s leading the attack

It is snapping at the others

Who show fear from all their lack


It opens up its mighty jaw

I see into the abyss

My bowel goes loose

I feel the noose

And I surrender into awe


I see my vine has wrapped itself

Around my ungrounded feet

I let go the mindless notion

I am the master of my peace



Suddenly I am pulled up

Like a predator from its lair

The clothes of my ego stripped

And I hang graciously in the air


I have my love and faith in God

To move this burden from my back

My soul laid bare of life’s trickery

I am not alone in this attack


Exposed of all my wretched longing

My vain and erotic spiritual show

I hang quietly in this soothing dark

And let God bathe me in his glow


God sent me to face these demons

He gave me all the tools for the task

For who else can slay evil villains

Than God in my own demons mask



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